Born in England in 1971, Martin Astles began life as a cabin boy. By the age of nine he had traveled the globe 11 times. He then realized that sea life mad him sick. At age 12, he restarted his career as a young chimney sweep in Old London Town. After a freak accident from being lodged in a small chimney, he was dragged out three years later squealing dirty insults. Two months passed and at 15 he discovered a talent for needle and thread. He stitched many outfits for the high society of Europe. He was then knighted at the tender age of 21 for outstanding needlework. He became tired and decided to change cours once more, moving into the ancient tradition of the lemonade stand. He ran this for 9 years outside Pinewood Studios in London, England. At 30, he realized that the English hate lemonade. It was at that point he realized that the UK wasn't big enough (as it was only two letters) and decided to upgrade to the USA (as it was three letters). He now resides in the deep desert with his outstanding and loving wife, Kristen Wilson (she is very thirsty) and their two wee nippers and a cat called Dave.
